Being Pregnant!!!

This post is mainly to remind me, not that I don't think I will forget, of what it is like to be pregnant. Today I am 29.5 weeks pregnant. Let me start from the beginning.

My reaction to each pregnancy has been different. With Kade we were excited being our first and all. Kyle was a little surprise, but Kade was 16 months old so it seemed fit to have another one. Connor was a complete surprise. I found out I was 10 weeks pregnant with him when Kyle was only 8 months old. I literally went to Eric crying that I was pregnant again. I just felt like I was starting to recover from having Kyle. With this one, Cam, I knew I was pregnant before I even purchased a pregnancy test. I am relieved Connor is as old as he is too, not that he is really old.

At the beginning of each pregnancy, except Connor, I am really sick. I am constantly throwing up and tired. I felt so bad for the boys and like a horrible mom because when Connor slept I turned on the T.V., went into my room and fell asleep. Thank goodness they just stayed in the T.V. room or their room while I was sleeping. I didn't feel like doing anything. The sight and smell of food would make me gag, so we ate out a lot. I didn't eat or drink anything. Our house was a disaster because I just did not have the energy to clean up. My doctor, Dr. Groom, gave me some medicine to help with all the sickness. Funny story about picking up my medicine....

I went to my first doctor's appointment and he told me they needed to hook me up to an IV due to me being so lathargic. Because of insurance the doctor could not do that at his office I would have to go to the emergency room. Knowing that I would be sitting there forever he gave me my prescription, to try to drink anything I could and to come back the next day to see if my levels were back to normal. My mom had the boys and I called her crying. She spent the rest of the day taking me to get drinks that I thought I would keep down and to pick up the medicine. While we were waiting for the prescription to be ready we went to Wal Mart. It was not that fun, for my mom nor I, to hassle with three boys at the store. I literally felt like I was going to pass out. We finally went to the check out line, the "20 items or less" check out line. Come to find out, right after we emptied our cart, we found out the people were waiting to get a price check. It was taking forever!!!! I noticed another line had only one person in it, so I re-loaded all of out items into the cart. Just as I was able to go to the next line a lady pulled up with well over 20 items. I was so mad. I asked her if she could see the sign. She just ignored me. I am muttering under my breath, still ready to pass out. Her husband told her to just go to a different line. She walked past me saying something like, "Well if it makes you happy" to me. We went to the other line and checked out. Low and behold the people were out and on their way before we were. I am usually the person in line just watching others be silly. I am patient, even though my monkeys are climbing and getting into EVERYTHING. Pregnancy, especially at that time, makes me soooo impatient.

After a few days with the medicine I started to feel better. I finally hit 12 weeks and the sickness was over. My energy and patience started to come back. Everything was back to normal until I came upon the third trimester. Now I am always tired, but can't sleep. My energy levels are extremely low. I have been trying to teach the boys that they can make messes as long as they clean them up. Most of the time they are pretty good at it. I just can't keep cleaning up after them. It makes me exhausted and my body, especially my back, starts to hurt. The only thing that seems to help relieve the pain and relax my body is a nice, warm bath (with no children, screaming, crying or staring at me). Because of all of this my patience levels are low. I find myself being mad at my boys for things I normally would have patience for. I have tried to explain to them that I am just not feeling well because Cam is taking all of my energy. They, especially little Connor, do not understand. I even snapped at Eric the other day for forgetting to give me something I needed. I rarely snap at him for anything. I will be so excited when the next 9.5 weeks are over and I can hold Cam in my arms and have my body back to myself. Being pregnant is just not fun.

Needless to say, Eric and I have decided for sure, little Cam is our last baby. I really do not want to be pregnant again. But most of important I get a peaceful feeling that everybody that is suppose to be in our family is here. I use to feel like someone is missing. I do not feel that way anymore. Sometimes I feel like my church friends think I am crazy for doing what I want to do. I then talk to my non-LDS friends and they think we are crazy for having four kids. I know though, no matter what, the decision is ours and what we feel is right for our family.

I will be so happy when May 21 comes along! It is not too far :)